What makes a toddler educator to to throw themselves into the conflict in the Middle East?
You, I've always been fond of dipping candles.
And so I sat with stearinbalja mi and watched a documentary from the West Bank.
And here I sat in my own living room and made light -
- and where they live in darkness Palestinians.
And then... Then the idea was born: Light a candle for Ramallah.
- How has the response been? - Absolutely stunning. Absolutely incredible.
I have gotten with some cultural figures.
We have created a "Light a candle for Ramallah" song.
We are looking forward to hearing it. Thank you.
The book "Healthy Living Goomba" -
- he has topped bestseller lists in both the USA and Europe.
New York Times calls him the Italian low-carb godfather.
Here are a mafia member was cookbook author: Joey Salmone.
Hi!
Welcome. I mentioned your book here... How did you get that idea?
Frank Costello, Lucky Luciano, Al Capone. Do you know how they died?
- They were shot or something like that? - No.
The dead of lifestyle-related diseases -
- characterized by high intakes of fat, sugar and wheat products.
Is it true?
Before I lived in constant fear.
Today is my biggest concern that the pasta will cook for a long time.
- Joey Salmone, thank you for coming. - Thank you, Fredrik.
See you here in the studio next week.
But before that, well, here's the song: "Light a candle for Ramallah".
I have seen bombs fall, and I felt a shudder.
Then I felt the call to light my candles.
Tears of stearic to nitroglycerin.
If you love God or Allah, if your name is Jens or Abdallah,
if you love God or Allah,
light a candle, light a candle, light a candle for Ramallah.
Hurry up, I want out of here.
What the hell...?! Races!
Hell!
Damn!
3-0 from 37-20! Shooting Stureplan! Come on!
3-0 arrived!
Hi! You, stop there! Stop, I said!
Police! Stop or I'll shoot!
Police!
On behalf of Vinmonopolet I am very proud to introduce -
- our newest wine, and not least the man behind it all:
Johnny Henriksen!
Thank you, thank you.
When I came to Norway, I was struck by all the beauty.
Beautiful scenery, beautiful people... Not to mention their beautiful BNP.
But you Norwegians have one fault:
You do not know how to enjoy life.
That's why we opened this club, and why we are launching this wine.
So cheers, 'a!
A local activist, Aubrey Hovland, leads a campaign against Israel.
And since you are using Israeli grapes, is your wine on the boycott list her.
- Do not answer that. - We do not need to apologize.
Israel is a beacon of freedom in a region full of Arab crazies.
Will venstreraddiser buy their wine of Al Qaeda, it's their problem.
But here we prefer taste of democracy.
We just drop the questions now, so just...
- We drink, 'a! - Cheers!
Tough crowd.
What the hell do you mean that the assignment is not done?!
The sod is rich in Mom's recipes, and so miss you?!
What should I do? I'm shot in the leg, swarming with cops here, and I'm dying.
Okay, we'll get you away from there.
We have a friend in a Norwegian town called Lillehammer.
Norway? What should I do there?
Just do as I say!
Welcome back. Buy our wine.
- We have a problem. - What?
Journalist tweet your comment, and it creates uproar on social media.
To hell with social media! Children's teenage girls and gays.
There is, however liquor store lady is reasonably stressed, -
- so she decides to drop our wine.
OMG... Is everyone in this country bløthjerta liberals?
I know. I... I do not know.
But she boycott chick seems to be very good at influencing public opinion.
Really? When we get well affect her opinion, then.
I was surprised when you called. It has not been so easy to get hold of you.
It was a... great and powerful light.
Yes.
What is it you want with it here?
We have the shit when we are together, and then just suddenly disappear you.
God, now it was only as very serious in here.
You need to refresh yourself a little. Come on!
- Locked you? - No.
- Is this you looking for? - Give me the keys!
Hi! First you have to love to end the boycott of Israel!
What ?! Give me the keys!
We are the Israeli intelligence service Mossad !
We have killed people in Lillehammer before, and can do it again!
We start with your girlfriend, with the shrunken testicles!
- I'll do anything. Give me the keys. - Run and fetch them!
- Hello, hello. - Halla.
Sorry I'm late, I had to working overtime at work and...
- Sorry, I was so hungry. - I take some crackers or something like that.
You?
What is it?
It's something we need to talk about.
Ok.
- Do you have a fever or something? - No, you have to look at it.
- But you have to say something. - There is no...
If you do not want, so we can do something else. I do not know.
No, no. I will not... I will not...
I will not do anything else, unless you want to do something else.
Yes, good.
Congratulations.
Ok.
Have a toy box in the attic of the old days. The boy is going to love it.
- You do not know if it is a boy, then. - There will be a boy, I know.
- Looking for this? - Hello?
I always knew I would get a violent death.
But I was not prepared for the humiliation by being killed with knitting needles.
By a Norwegian.
I admire you. I do it.
I killed some guys a few years ago, -
- and it gnawed at my conscience. Eat me up inside.
You do not seem to have that problem?
- You do not exist. - Do not I?
Dry toys.
- Wet toys. - What the hell...?
This, my friend, is supernatural piss.
Stop! Hold up!
What are you doing, man?
Wait! I have not told you the big news.
The baby in the belly of your woman...
- This is mine. - Shut up!
Yes. The little whore was so lonely while was out and licked Johnny up along the back.
- I had fuck her. - Shut up!
Torgeir?
- Who are you talking to? - I just called and ordered some pizza.
But then I remembered that I was not hungry, so I canceled. Shall we go down?
- If you leave it and burn all night? - No, you're crazy.
YeeHaa!
I have good news for you. Activist Dama has canceled all boycott.
Great.
- Is it good? - Yes, I just dropped off some.
Where's the bear?
- Bjørn? - Eh... Brumlemann?
Bear? Brumlemann!
- You do not think he could have run into the street? - I... I do not know.
Bears! Bjorn!
Bears! Yes, the...
- Is it him? - Maybe. I do not know.
Wait, then, we must find...
Oh, thank God! We really started to get worried.
Thank you for looking after him. This is father to bear.
- Cops want to talk to you a little bit first. - Cops?
I say this once: Give me my baby.
No, now you listen to me, your foreigner.
I am even a result of neglect, and do not let the same thing happen with... Jørn.
His name is Bear.
It is not your mother's fault that you are running.
You're running because you are a pitiful narkisdritt!
- This is your last chance. - What are you...
Ouch! Fuck!
I know who you are. Cops! Hello!
The Way!
Wait.
Keep the kids here.
Where are all the blondes you hear about?
Sweden. You have run error.
- Are you the one who is Frank? - It happens.
They call me Johnny here.
You did not long hit.
I'm a little wounded.
Can you get me a doctor... and a glass of vodka?
Should be.
Got tips from New York that he could emerge. It is the nephew of Uncle Sal.
He gave us the green light in New York.
- Then we both take care of him? - Correct.
- We just have to get him to the emergency room. - Maybe we should keep this secret.
What about the doctor that you had?
- What? The evil witch there? - Ok, bad idea.
Wait... what the midwife? That took our kids.
We let him get act on Krita in return?
- How much is it up to now? - I think there are around 50 000
Bingo!
- Should I get some more shells? - Yes.
Long time no see. Come into my office.
- What's this? - We need medical help.
- Birth? - Something like that. Come on.
Show him that.
- But what the hell are you doing here? - You need to remove the bullet.
Does it completely clicked for you?
Either that, or you do up the entire bill now.
Now? What is it?
It's madness! I am not a surgeon!
Relax. Can you patch up cans on a woman, so can you solve this here.
- Hello! Hello! Give me anesthetic! - I have no anesthesia!
What kind of doctor are you ?!
I'm not just a doctor!
But... I am authorized midwife.
A what ?!
This goes to hell!
Can he get out a kid, he can get out a bullet.
No, no, no!
- Ali, was it? - Yes. Muhammad Abdul Aziz Ali.
You, I must admit that I understood not quite all the complaint your emails.
- Is it benefit you are unhappy with? - No, no. The benefit is finfin.
Think you might not have done enough for to resosialisere me back into society.
- And what do you expect really when? - No, well...
Some form of group activity or group of friends or something...
Now offers the not we like that here, unfortunately.
When a man with my skills celebrates his birthday entirely alone, -
- then the system failure in some joints.
Suspect the joint sitting right in front of me here now.
- Excuse me, here is... - I know that I am a complicated case.
Norwegian and Iraqi and well-educated, but was inside.
Falling between two stools, but it is so important that we take action now.
- Maybe you should try Facebook? - Facebook?
- Do you know what was so good in Norway before? - No.
We had a safety net that captures people before they fall outside the.
- Yes, but we still have. - The web is rotten!
Do you know what? I think it is sad that you experience it that way.
But now we have almost round.
For a kick!
Congratulations, you've just born September 1 millimeter bullet.
I do not recommend breastfeeding.
You actually lives here in this shitty place.
Yes.
Happy birthday da, Jan.
Ho-ho!
- Was there a problem here? - No.
I'll talk to Labour and Social Affairs Robert Eriksson.
- Do not have an agreement, you will not meet him. - Would have liked to appeal.
It's committed a serious procedural error one of Eriksson's maidservants.
- You can try to call. - I have called 42 times for blacks fuck!
Ask him FRP sod come down and talk to me!
- I almost think you should go now. - It is typically Norwegian to be good.
There we used to say before. Do you know what we should say something now?
It is typically Norwegian to be a fucking pussy bitch!
Are! I think we have a situation here.
No, I can walk. I'll go myself. Release! I cand., Damn!
Oh, thank you.
Thank you, thank you. Careful with hair.
Now?
Do I...
A big applause for Flamingos big band!
I want to thank everyone who has come here tonight to celebrate Flamingo wine.
After a turbulent start, I can now tell that we have sold our first thousand bottles.
Let this be the start of something beautiful. Continue to enjoy yourselves.
"Ring-a-Ding-Ding, baby! Ring-a-Ding-Ding!"
- I? - Yes.
If you insist...
- Cheers' a, guys! - Cheers!
You put it on the bill, right?
Hi! Good to see you back on their feet.
- Yes, he midwife could their cases. - Only the best for Sals people.
I thought Norway was the world boring place, but this is the shit.
Thank you.
You do well not happen a man?
- You would not have thrived here. - Why not?
It's a completely different culture. It's different.
Maybe I could learn?
With all due respect... You are here because of your uncle.
My job is to get you safely back to him. The sooner, the better.
As you wish, Frank. This is your club.
Oi.
Leste Mamma Online that it was okay to fuck even if you were pregnant.
Yes, yes. It is certainly nice, it.
So romantic.
- Come on, then. - Yes.
Eh... I also read that it is best for kid if I come in on the back.
- If it's okay for you? - Yes. Ok, we make it.
Scented candle and panpipes. Your fucking hippie.
- Shut up! - Oh yes, talk dirty to me.
That's what all women want. Getting fucked like animals.
Come on. Fuck her like the dog she is.
- Like that, yes. Continue! Drive on! - Shut up!
Fuck her, your Nordic idiot. Fuck her, I said! Harder!
Come on! Harder! Fuck her!
- Ouch! - Harder!
Ouch! Ouch!
- Ouch! Hello! - Oi...
- What the hell ?! What are you doing? - Sorry, it was... Eh...
It did shit hurt!
Ok. What is it now?
- A race car driver? - Yes.
Child Welfare.
What is happening?
- Hello. I am Terje Olsen from child welfare. - My child's safety is good, thanks.
Understand that this can be a bit tricky, but we've got a concern.
- Narkis in the park? - It's not the only reason why I'm here.
We have found that there have been episodes where you lost your temper, -
- and we fear that it happens while children are present as well.
I do not have temperament, except it I'll shove up your ass.
- Have you abused your children physically? - Get out!
Whether you want to or not, I consider your expertise as a caregiver.
- Follow Olsen to the door. - No, no, no... This can not go.
This will take you to regret. Put me down! The end!
- To hell with him, right? - To hell with him.
- Are not you at work? - No, I truant today.
- Is it good with the butt or something? - Yes, just a little sore.
I like aloe vera, if you think it helps?
- Yes, it may not be so silly. - It is 90 percent fresh...
- What... What are you doing? - I knit for baby.
- Is the child's father who gave you the idea? - What are you talking about?
I see that you are knitting the English flag! How we do this!
Have you clicked completely?
Come on! Get out your English bastard!
All right, your pussy!
No! What... Finally, Torgeir!
I shall kill you, your fucking pussy! Your fucking pussy!
Stop! Torgeir! Torgeir, finally!
Your fucking pussy!
Torgeir? Torgeir?
Hello.
- What was it that happened? - Probably just something low blood sugar or...
It does not protrude himself in the throat because of low blood sugar.
It is not unusual to have that kind... jerking when you faint.
Torgeir... Now you're going to to tell me what happened.
It is probably something like this... Maybe it was something that happened then.
For a while sia, and then I might developed some mental stuff on it, then.
Ok, but if you have some mental stuff, please tell me.
We will be parents. We can not have that kind secrets from each other.
There is a little sensitive...
There is a little touchy... area...
I tend to talk to my brother about such things, i.
Yes, but now you can talk to me.
I tend to prefer talking to my brother about it.
Ok.
- It... was not... Do not... - Call your brother, you.
Go to hell!
You give doped to our Norwegian contact two days after you have arrived.
- I do not think I can do this. - Either this, -
- or I will kill you, the little girl and her brother.
Ok, this is better.
Be careful with it. Your life depends on what comes up.
Ok.
Welcome to Galeão-Antônio Carlos Jobim International Airport.
- It's a drug dog. It's the police. - Relax, Roar. For God's sake.
I... I can not. I can not do this.
I need the toilet.
Hell!
No...
Talkumuhell. Yes!
Ok.
- Are there any problems? - No problems. It goes well.
- So when we go. - Yeah, ok. Come on.
- What are you doing? - Good afternoon to you too. What's going on?
Now, child protection called. They should start full assessment of you.
- For any nonsense. - Yes?
There is a big misconception. We lost bear a half minutes in the park -
- and then makes someone a big issue of it.
They call and say that you have thrown out one of their expert witnesses from the club.
This here is not funny. You can not keep on like that.
Do you know what? The authorities must learn to mind his own business.
Do you hear what I said? It is child protection.
Do you want to lose custody?
- Ok. - Ok?
Ok.
Will you join if I arranged a meeting and try to fix the issue?
Yes, that's fine. Of course I'll join you.
- Lucky I ran into you. - What do you want?
We need to discuss how we can best describe Johnny Henriksen father.
- Excuse me? I heard not quite? - Johnny is a very good father.
Not quite the wording I'm after.
How about: "Johnny is a damn good father", and it must state in your report!
Lucky you had a helmet. Safety first.
You can not sit and hold on to them. You...
Sorry I'm late. I have to take the ointment every hour, so...
- What happened to you? - I dropped the bike.
- But is it good or what? - Yes.
The reason we are here is that I did a phone on a study of Johnny and...
This is not necessary. I have already sent a report -
- concluding that Henriksen has an excellent parenting skills.
- And that means...? - That he has an excellent ability to care.
- I do not understand. - You are an outstanding father, Johnny.
- Oh? So that was it, then? - Yeah.
- As the matter is subject to death, then? - Yes.
That's what I said. There is a misconception.
Come.
- Thanks for joining us. Good improvement, then. - Thank you.
Thank you. And have a good time.
- Hello! - Hey.
I'm not saying no thanks.
What has happened here?
The guy from the child welfare system.
Had a feeling of that it could be you.
I thought that since I well here I might as well help out.
It's so good, what you have here, and I want to learn from you.
You are a legend at home, as you probably know.
Yes... A man with your abilities can come in handy.
My name is Muhammad Abdul Aziz Ali.
When you see it here, so... have you surely heard about me on the news.
Media will present me as terrorist and public enemy.
But I am a man who through whole life to good Norwegian values ​​-
- like compassion, integration expertise.
As a newly qualified officer at the municipal level as -
- I learned very quickly that everyone deserves a second chance.
"Shall be treated as air" -
- Says the State tjenestebok for social workers.
These here are the values ​​that are completely forgotten the Lord... shit landed here.
It takes a strong lye to to wake Norway, -
- and it is with great sadness that I sacrifice myself in a spot marking.
A selection I have chosen to add holet where humiliations against my person started.